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Tuesday, March 22, 2011

A time for reflection and decisions.

Hey guys, sorry it has been so long.
I have stayed away from the forums, blogs and groups etc in the (miserable) attempt to get my life back on track and in a straight-ish line. Unfortunately it hasn't all gone to plan and I am still feeling pretty down about everything and hating on life. I know that eventually I will have to crawl out of this hole but I just haven't managed to get there yet.
There is still a good 7-10 months of wait time before we start our next cycle, I am trying to get my body a little more healthy for it but I am seriously lacking the energy to do much.I have managed to lose a few kg's so I guess thats good.

We have also been discussing our future, thinking about plans etc. We made a decision the other night that if it gets to the point of looking at adoption then it's probably time for us to just stop. We are still going to go to an information evening to get a few facts straight and all that, but, and while I realise this is just what works for us and not others, we need to draw a line in the sand for ourselves. We need to know that this is not going to go on forever and that even if it a sad one, there is an end in sight. We have given ourselves a definite 2 more rounds of IVF and then we will need to do some re-evaluating.

So that is where I have been all this time, the pressure on our relationship has started to show in the last couple of months but we have re-opened the lines of communication and are looking forward... well as far forward as we will let ourselves anyway.

So I hope everyone out there in IF land is doing well and moving forwards in their own ways. I have been trying to block out the horrid side effects I suffered from those meds and the emotional pain of the cycle and look forward to our next big shot.

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